Why do I struggle to understand Emotions?

Consider this for a moment: everything around us, whether material or immaterial, is intricately connected to emotion in some form or another. Our beliefs give rise to religions and governments. Our insecurities propel us into wars and the creation of militaries. Hope drives the creation of technologies and infrastructure. And curiosity fuels the pursuit of scientific discovery. It’s not just on a grand scale; even on a personal level, many aspects of our lives, such as our relationships, self-presentation, and perceptions of others, are influenced by our fundamental emotions.

So, by this notion, one might argue that emotions are vital for leading a fulfilling life, wouldn’t you agree? Consequently, it stands to reason that those who grapple with emotions also face challenges in life. Well, this blog goes precisely into that topic: my struggle with understanding emotions. I’ve encountered my fair share of difficulties stemming from my inability to grasp others’ emotions as well as my own. However, as someone who fancies himself a practitioner of science, I’ve been compelled to explore why this is the case. Why do some individuals seem to comprehend emotions better than I do? And is there a pathway for me to enhance my understanding of emotions in the future?

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It might be some form of dyslexia

Look at the Mona Lisa; it’s undoubtedly a masterpiece. Many individuals who may not comprehend paintings, or art in general, would argue that its fame lies in its realism. Painting something realistic requires immense talent, they’d say. For those with an artistic inclination and a deeper emotional connection to art, the discussion revolves around the mysterious smile and the subtleties of eye movement. The intricacies of that ‘smile’ are simply too complicated. Capturing this ’emotion’ itself is an art, let alone executing it perfectly.

Leonardo taught himself the anatomy of the face, gaining a comprehensive understanding of every facial muscle that influences our smile. He delved into optics, exploring how objects farther away react to light differently than closer ones. A master of paint itself, he possessed a solid grasp of physics and chemistry to create pigments and comprehend their relationship with reflections. After a lifelong pursuit of curiosity, he amalgamated all this knowledge into a single painting, crafting that iconic smile. Tell me if that isn’t fascinating to you!

But how does this relate to emotions, you might wonder? Well, here’s my controversial statement: I believe Leonardo wasn’t inherently an emotional man. He didn’t perceive himself as an artist; rather, he identified as a scientist or engineer. His approach to painting wasn’t primarily about expressing something; it was a quest for truth — more of a scientific journey than an artistic one. I suspect he struggled with emotions, much like I do, given that my perspective on art or anything else tends to be analytical rather than emotional. So maybe he and I share a common trait, maybe I am Leonardo like genius too (lol). There is substantial evidence where scientists have proved that Leonardo was dyslexic, which might have been the reason for his acute artistic curiosity.

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How Emotions are made?

First and foremost, we need to grasp the essence of emotions. Understanding what emotions are will shed light on why individuals like myself may struggle to comprehend them fully.

A prevailing belief suggests that emotions are simply chemical reactions in our brain, mechanisms devised to respond to our surroundings. Feeling threatened? Your heart rate spikes, body temperature rises, gearing you up for action. Our brain signals these physiological changes, interpreting them as fear or threat. Yet, emotions encompass more than survival instincts. They facilitate happiness, foster positive connections, and prompt facial expressions like smiles. When we beam with joy, our brain instructs facial muscles to stretch, radiating happiness to those around us. This intricate process underscores our brain’s role in perceiving the world and guiding our bodily responses. While philosophers term it ’emotions,’ the scientific community remains uncertain about its precise nomenclature.

Emotions transcend mere chemical reactions in the brain. They are influenced by three key factors:

1. Perception: How we perceive and interpret the world around us.
2. Experience: Our past encounters and knowledge of a given situation.
3. Neuroscience: The intricate workings of the brain and its neural pathways involved in emotional processing.

Let me explain,

Core Affect: I perceive my emotions differently (?)

Sadly, in the last few years, some of my friends lost their fathers. I felt terrible for not being able to support them emotionally, but I helped them cope by talking about random things and distracting them from their emotions.

What fascinated me is how they reacted to this grief. One of my friends was completely down even after 2 years of that incident. The other was already working hard on himself and doing well in his career just after two months. Different people, different reactions.

The pain of losing a father is immense. But it also depends on many other factors; coping mechanisms vary for different people. Some have strong coping mechanisms because they understand that there’s nothing they can do about their father now, and it’s time to move on. Others get stuck in the past, ruminating over their father-son bond, unable to break that loop!

This all hinges on how we perceive the world

“Imagine for a moment that we are nothing but the product of billions of years of molecules coming together and ratcheting up through natural selection, that we are composed only of highways of fluids and chemicals sliding along roadways within billions of dancing cells, that trillions of synaptic conversations hum in parallel, that this vast egglike fabric of micron-thin circuitry runs algorithms undreamt of in modern science, and that these neural programs give rise to our decision making, loves, desires, fears, and aspirations. To me, that understanding would be a numinous experience, better than anything ever proposed in anyone’s holy text.”

David Eagleman

We receive data about the world through our sensory organs, and then our brain processes it to construct our ‘reality.’ Psychologists have long been studying consciousness; whatever we perceive in this reality is nothing but an illusion. In the real world, there are no colors, smells, tastes, sounds, or textures. All of these sensory experiences are created by our brain and exist within our consciousness. So when we observe that different people react differently to similar situations, it’s because their brains are designed differently. Thus, when my friends witnessed their father’s passing, they reacted differently because their brains processed this data differently, creating a distinct reality for each of them. Universe has no emotion to it, it is only a arrangement of atoms.

However, there’s more to the story than just perceiving the world and processing data; it also depends on our past experiences.

Psychological content of emotional experience

I am just getting started in my corporate life. Implementing the tasks assigned to me and then showing the results of what I have done to my boss or seniors is an essential part of my day-to-day life. That’s how the corporate world operates. Sometimes, I find my work mundane and lack motivation to complete tasks. So, I procrastinate until my boss is over my head asking me for results. In the initial days of my working, whenever this used to happen, I would experience anxiety to the point where my brain would go into a numb mode, causing me to perform tasks mindlessly and struggle to optimize my energy and time, occasionally missing deadlines.

However, over time, I started to get the hang of it. Now, when I find myself in such situations, I am more prepared than ever. I plan things properly, keep my procrastination in check, and manage my emotions. And I no longer get anxious but rather feel excited about solving certain problems. I am sure many of you have experienced a similar situation at some point.

How past experiences affect our emotions

The emotional center of the brain, known as the amygdala, is linked to our hippocampus, a memory unit. Therefore, our reaction to any situation depends on our past experiences with that situation. It doesn’t necessarily mean we’ve encountered the exact same scenario before; rather, it could be a combination of similar experiences. Completing tasks under pressure requires various skills: coding efficiently, articulating ideas to stakeholders while managing stage fright, and meeting others’ expectations. Thus, our emotional responses are rooted in our past experiences.

How to manage Anxiety/Stress like a Neuroscientist?

Trauma, Grief, Happiness and our cultural background play a huge role

Trauma also impacts our cognitive abilities. For instance, someone who has recently experienced a car accident may struggle to drive confidently for some time afterward. Similarly, positive experiences influence our emotional responses. Nostalgia often evokes memories of happy moments from our college or school years long after we’ve left them. There is substantial evidence linking success in life to strong emotional support. Those with stable families and stronger ties are much happier than those who are lonely. Our reactions to situations also stem from our culture, the part of the world we live in, our family values, and our educational background.

Obviously, it’s not just about what we perceive and how we react; it’s not simply what goes into our brain and what comes out. There are also neuroscientific reasons to consider.

Neurobiological bases of emotion

When we are born, our brain comes preloaded with certain information. For example, babies don’t need to be taught how to breathe, see, or move their hands. They instinctively know how to express their emotions too; they cry, squeeze their eyes shut, cuddle, and show affection. Nobody teaches them these things; it’s innate.

So, the neuroscientific aspect comes into play here as well. Emotions are not just something we feel; they are also pre-built into our brains over millennia. Anxiety, for instance, is a natural reaction to perceived threats. It’s a built-in function that causes our heart rate to increase and our blood pressure to rise when we’re under pressure—much like how our ancestors reacted when they encountered a tiger while foraging.

Our brain activity is universal

It’s evident when scientists detect these brain activities associated with different emotions. Moreover, these brain activities are universal; all of us react almost identically to such emotions, displaying similar brain reactions. So, despite differences in our perceived reality and actual reactions, our brain activity is largely similar in general terms. You can observe this in the diagram below.

Analytical brain overrides emotional brain

When I say I don’t understand emotions, I don’t mean I don’t feel them at all. I do experience emotions, but my brain isn’t as adept as the average person’s at perceiving or connecting them with my past experiences. So, whenever something good or bad happens to me, my analytical brain—which differs from my emotional brain—overrides my perception, causing me to react in a more analytical manner than an emotional one.

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This blog stands as proof of my ongoing journey, maybe. I’m not alone in questioning the complexities of emotions. Yet, I’ve found myself drawn to the scientific path over the philosophical one, as I struggle to see the usefulness of philosophical thinking in understanding emotions—ironically, the very subject I’ve been wrestling with. In many ways, this blog mirrors the mysterious smile of the Mona Lisa—an exploration that seems scattered, yet inherently driven by the quest for truth.

Will I ever unlock the secrets of emotions? The answer escapes me, hidden in layers of complexity. However, amidst this uncertainty, there lies a glimmer of hope. Our brains possess an innate ability for growth and change. They can be shaped and trained. So, while the path may be winding and uncertain, I hold onto the belief that with dedication and persistence, I may one day achieve the understanding and mastery of emotions that I seek. But till that time, it is what it is, it’s a long pursuit…

Thanks for reading!

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